Hair Today, Gone Tomorrow *update*
This weekend found Isa losing more and more hair. In fact, she put in a barrette at one point, and like all good little girls instead of opening it she just yanked it out. Along with a lot of her hair. Then sister declared, “pull out more” and she grabbed it and yanked. Needless to say, I screamed, NO……. you can pretend that the dots represent the long drawn out mournful sound of a mother who isn’t quite ready to give up her daughter’s hair.
Well, at least I wasn’t ready until today. We have been planning on snipping it off when it became “time” to do so. Well, it was time. She had hair all over her pillow for days. She has been eating and stray hairs will fall into her food. Or as a mama I am grabbing the ones that just sort of dangle there. You know, like sticking out a little bit. She promptly swats my hand or moves her head.
So, Papa shaved her head today.
It was a good thing, but it meant coming to terms with the fact that she was losing it. She has cancer. I love her so much and it is so hard to watch these treatments affect her body. Hair loss, weight loss, trouble walking, hands shaking, dilated eyes, loss of appetite, changes in mood.
We start treatments again on Thursday, with a bang. Or is it a tap, considering we will have a bone marrow biopsy, and a spinal tap and two kinds of IV chemo. I am ready for all of this to go.
Isa looks gorgeous without her hair. Unbelievably I see her as more beautiful now without it. And somehow it seems like we have reached a milestone. Like having it hang over our heads was just bugging. Once it starts to grow back in, then we will know she is getting stronger and recovering.