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January 20, 2009

Classification or Category unknown.

Status of life: Unknown.

I feel like I am stuck in a loop, of Maslow’s Hierarchy. It seems just as one thing becomes solid, the earth changes again. Like I just ride on some sort of teutonic plate throughout life.’s_hierarchy_of_needs.

I wish I could explain it better, but no one can understand what is happening with us. Maybe other cancer parents, but each situation is different. For some reason, Papa & I seem to be able to find the HARDEST path, and take that one. Makes for some interesting dinner conversations. It leads our immediate families to shake their heads frequently. No one can understand why we do the things we do. I’m not sure why we do the things we do. Misguided good intentions?

Papa just had tea with the girls. We aren’t focused, we are scattered and maybe scared, but not so much. More like annoyed. Today is a feeling day. My stomach hurts. I have no idea if it is nerves, something I ate or didn’t eat. My thoughts are scattered. How this is different from my usual self, well, I don’t know. Not much different actually.

The goal is to keep Isa healthy. Dr. Fallon said that any type of mold spores can be bad for her. Anyone who has spent time in Madison will note that mold is rampant. It is an old damp town full of musty, dusty and moldy things. Obviously, she can’t be out and about in crowds, or anywhere there could be a threat to her.

If she gets an infection, she WILL BE READMITTED to the hospital on IV antibiotics. If she gets a fever we call the pediatric oncologist on call, who will then direct us to the emergency room or to take tylenol then go to the emergency room. If we go to the emergency room we will be admitted. Riley has satellite clinics in Fort Wayne & South Bend, but nothing in Southern Indiana. According to her last labs, her platlets look good. Dr. Vyck seemed to think that her bloodwork looked good. Ideally, she won’t need anymore blood transfusions.

Right now, I feel more comfortable being a hop-skip-jump away from the hospital, but this could change as I adapt more to being a cancer mom.

Thanks again to all who have helped.

Thanks to the visitors: Auntie, Paula, Archbishop Daniel, Uncle Jeff, Grandpa E, Ms. Amy,  Rachel, D & D, Sister Louise

It was certainly enough to feel loved and not enough to feel overwhelmed. The tea set was a HIT. The painting markers were fun today.

Thanks to all the blog visitors.

4 Comments leave one →
  1. ashley permalink
    January 25, 2009 7:19 pm

    .stay strong; you are an awesome MOM and are so on top of everything it is incredible! I know you both have to be exhausted. If there is anything I can do here for you; just yell. Where are you guys staying?

  2. January 21, 2009 12:16 am

    I wish it were that easy, Auntie. Mold is actually eats bleach, depending on which surface is lives on. Because the bleach is made with water. Bleach works on certain surfaces.

    Mold in the air is the problem for Isa, for all of us actually. If she breathes it in, it can live inside of her whereas we can fight it off. The worst type is the toxic black mold. She can’t even eat Roquefort.

    Thanks to wiki for the following:

    Some cheeses have additional bacteria or molds intentionally introduced to them before or during aging. In traditional cheesemaking, these microbes might be already present in the air of the aging room; they are simply allowed to settle and grow on the stored cheeses. More often today, prepared cultures are used, giving more consistent results and putting fewer constraints on the environment where the cheese ages. These cheeses include soft ripened cheeses such as Brie and Camembert, blue cheeses such as Roquefort, Stilton, Gorgonzola, and rind-washed cheeses such as Limburger.

    SEE MOLD IN THE AIR! Makes good cheese, makes little leukemia girls sick.

  3. Auntie permalink
    January 20, 2009 10:15 pm

    Elisa, Open the windows and bleach the bathroom– bleach kills mold. Honey, I know you’re scared but mold is everywhere–you just ventilate good and swab down with bleach. I do it all the time (well not all the time). where in the world are you anyhow? Are you afraid of mold at the hotel? Have Greg take the kids out while you open the windows or the door and bleach with their wash cloths–the hotel will have the whitest wash cloths ever when you get done :):):). you’ll be fine. mold likes wet places. you’re going to be fine. you’ve held together VERY well. everyone has “melt-downs” –it was bound to happen sometime. you’ve had it now, you’ll be fine BUT where are you??????? Love auntie

  4. Deadra aka Demie permalink
    January 20, 2009 9:32 pm

    where are you all staying? Could you give me a snail-mail addy??

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